АНЕКДОТЫ (FUNNY STORIES)

In front of a delicatessen, an art connoisseur noticed a mangy little kitten lapping up milk from a saucer. The saucer, he realized with a start, was a rare and precious piece of pottery...
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Two ministers were discussing the lack of morals in the modern world.
"I didn't sleep with my wife before we were married," said one clergyman self-righteously. "Did you?"...
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A town in Poland had only one cow, and it stopped giving milk. The townspeople did a little research and discovered they could get a cow from Moscow for 2,000 rubles, but they could get a cow from Minsk for only 1,000 rubles. So they got the cow from Minsk...
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Morris comes home to find his wife, Sadie, crying.
"I found out from Mrs.Goldberg that you've been having an affair with that chippy secretary in your office...
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Some small-time crooks decided that people were so stupid that they would accept 18 dollar bills if somebody gave them any. So they carefully made some plates and printed some up, and went to a small town to try them out...
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The musician finally finished a new song, but no one buys it. He was telling another musician about it, and the other guy said, "Let me hear it."...
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A pretty well-dressed young lady stopped a taxi in a big square and said to the driver:
"Do you see that young man on the other side of the square?"
"Yes," said the taxi-driver.
The young man was standing outside the restaurant and looking impatiently at his watch every few seconds...
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A man was in a bar. Hoping to strike up a conversation with a distinguished looking fellow sitting nearby, he said, "May I buy you a drink?"...
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The saleswoman watched as a teen-ager twirled in front of the mirror.
"I adore this dress!" bubbled the girl. "It's absolutely perfect! I'll take it!"...
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A very elderly couple is having an elegant dinner to celebrate their 75th wedding anniversary. The old man leans forward and says softly to his wife, "Dear, there is something that I must ask you...
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